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Verde Magazine

Verde Magazine

Verde Magazine

Gay parents: The perspective of a child with two moms

Gay+parents%3A+The+perspective+of+a+child+with+two+moms

I am a child with two female parents. No, my dad did not leave me. Yes, I have a dad. No, I do not know his name. Yes, both of my moms have been my parental figures for my whole life. No, my biological mom did not dump my dad for a woman. 

The fact that they are of the same sex has not hindered my family life in any way. When I would tell people in elementary school that I have two moms, I would receive blank stares and then questions that started something like “Wait. So how…?” 

Of course, everyone was at that awkward stage where they were curious about everything and knew close to nothing. Every one of those kids I told in elementary school didn’t know how I could have two moms, but they were raised to be accepting of people like my parents.


Every now and then, we will run into the cloud at the end of the rainbow that is heteronormativity.

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My parents both grew up in fairly religious households and coming out was not easy, but their families came to accept and support them. If they had grown up in less accepting areas, they likely would have suppressed their feelings and you wouldn’t be reading this article written by the child of two lesbian moms. 

I do not want to paint my experience as all unicorns and rainbows — although, we do have a gay pride flag in our front yard. Every now and then, we will run into the cloud at the end of the rainbow that is heteronormativity.

I distinctly remember when my family went into a local bike shop a few years ago. I believe we were only looking for a helmet or some small accessory, so we waited for a salesman to help us with our decision. 

We noticed one salesman walking around and he noticed us, but did not approach us. We were all very confused until we saw the salesman help a man and a woman that had come in after us. So, we left.

Sunny Friedrich, a researcher who studied children with gay parents, feels that the Bay Area could improve with their acceptance of gay parents, despite how accepting the area is considered already.

“There were a lot of assumptions and inaccurate beliefs,” Friedrich said. 

Overall, I am happy living with two moms and I could not have asked for better parents.

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